When “I’ll Pray for You” Is An Insult


Sometimes words said with good intention can be insulting. We live in a world where it’s easier than ever to comment on a friend or family member’s trials, triumphs, and everything in-between. But do we stop to think before we insert our like, love, or laughing face?

I will be the first to say I love emojis and use them often in texts and on social media, but I often wonder what all this instant, no-thought-required communication is really doing to our ability to communicate. Take, for example, the statement, “I’ll pray for you.” Or the comment I see more often, “Thoughts and prayers!”

Now, by no means am I saying we shouldn’t pray for others. Sometimes, as I stated in my previous post, it’s all we can do. And let them know you’re praying. It can encourage a person’s heart to know there are people rallying behind them in prayer.

But what if there is something else we can do? What about the times when someone desperately needs help, and we could be the ones God uses to provide it?

There are times when I see people on Facebook crying out for help. Sometimes, it’s a home that’s flooded and they need a place to stay. Or they’re sick and could really use a hot meal. The possibilities are endless.

If we have the resources and ability to help the person in need, are we really displaying the love of Christ by saying “I’ll pray for you,” and then carrying on with our lives? While I’m certain God is all-powerful and able to swoop down, make the person some soup and deliver it to their front door, do you think maybe that’s what he’s called us to do instead?


When Jesus walked the earth during his earthly ministry, he prayed. A lot. He and the Father were in constant communion and he often removed himself from others completely so he could be alone in prayer.

But I don’t recall a single time when someone walked up to him, begging for help, food or shelter, and he said, “I’ll pray for you.” He knew there was a time to pray and a time to act, and he wasn’t going to mislead others by confusing the two.

John, who was with Jesus during most of his ministry, says it like this:

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

1 John 3:18 NIV

Friends, prayer was never intended to be used as an excuse for inaction. And I am convicted. I am guilty of turning the other way when I know God was asking me lend a helping hand, but he is showing me that if we are to be his hands and feet, we must act. We must move. We must do something other than say, “I’ll pray for you.”

I know there are seasons when we are stretched thin between little ones, jobs and other responsibilities. Prayer may truly be the best we have to offer. I know there are also times when we aren’t the best person to help.

But if we are constantly turning the other way, we need to reevaluate. We need to take a long hard look at ourselves and ask the question every person who attended VBS as a kid knows: What would Jesus do?

I can guarantee you, he would do more than sit. Let’s follow his example and do the same.


Linking up with these communities: #RaRaLinkup, #IntentionalTuesday

The Glue That Binds


Did you know that He prayed for you?  For me?  Before I was ever a glimmer of life in my mother’s eye, my Savior thought of me.

He didn’t pray that I’d have a trouble free life, that I’d make enough money to pay all the bills, or that I’d never experience heartbreak.  He prayed for unity.  With my brothers and sisters in Christ, with the people on the other side of the world I will probably never meet, with the neighbors who always let their dog leave presents in our yard.

In a world where we divide ourselves political stance, financial position, denomination and doctrinal views, Jesus prayed that we would be one.

His blood is the glue that holds us together.  He didn’t bleed only for me.  He also bled for a prophet who, when given instruction, fled in the opposite direction.  He bled for the thief who hung beside Him.

He bled for the one who denied Him three times, and upon his return, instead of badgering him, hung Himself out in the space between them, saying, “Do you love me?”

His Love is the glue.

He became the blackness that divided us from Heaven, his own body bearing the weight of it, and in that moment is own Father had to turn his back so that you and I could be free.

Free to choose.  And yet still some will say, “no.”  Still those of us who say, “yes” fight amongst each other.

I am a ligament that makes up a finger and you are another.  See that woman over there? She is the ear that hears the cries of the weak and says, “Mercy.”

We are One. God, help me not to be a lone part of the body trying to function without your Light, but a living, working part of the whole.


This was written in response to Lisa-Jo Baker’s Five Minute Friday prompt, glue.  Five Minute Friday is a wonderful community that gathers each week for uninhibited, glorious writing on one word for five minutes flat.  You can learn more by clicking the link below.


Five Minute Friday