When You Want to Hide Your Story

 exquisite



As I sat outside the conference room counting the minutes until my appointment, the tension was palpable. I tried to make nervous conversation with the woman sitting across from me, but my mind was too scattered.

What started as chit chat about the organization of the conference quickly fizzled into talk about nothing at all. I smiled and looked down at the folder containing my proposal.

I hoped it wouldn’t be long.

As if hearing my silent plea, the host called my name. I was ushered into a large room with a partition down the middle.

A young editor with long brunette hair and a warm smile greeted me with a firm handshake. Within five minutes, I gave her my story. My pitch.

All of the long hours, the tears, the research, doubt and fears were now lying on the table between us.

After just five minutes. There on the table.

I surprised myself with raw emotion as I held back tears, and when I looked across at her, I could see she was holding them back too.

I felt a strange sense of release. It was out there. My story. My song.

What I’d gripped so tightly to for so long was now in the hands of someone else, but instead of feeling anxiety, I felt relief.

I was perplexed. After all, I didn’t know what she would do with my story. She might stash it away in a folder somewhere, never to be seen by anyone but her.

She might love it, but be unable to market it. I simply didn’t know.

For a brief instant, I longed to tuck my story back into a safe place. To keep it in the loving embrace of the folder where it could never be criticized, rejected or forgotten.

We’ve all been there, haven’t we? We clutch tightly to our stories, telling ourselves that they’re not good enough or riveting enough or sad enough.

So we keep them tucked away where no one can see or hear them, convinced that no one will ever know or care.

I hear the distress on the Facebook thread, in the comment section on a popular blog, at the MOPS meeting and at church.

“My life is boring. I don’t have anything to offer.”

Perhaps no one ever told you. Perhaps you are in a household where no one sees your work or your value, and you’ve begun to question it yourself.

Maybe you grew up in a home where you were under the constant shadow of a sibling who begged for attention while you wondered when someone would notice your struggle.

Friend, can I tell you something? Can I grip your face and repeat this until it sinks into the depths of your being?

Your story is exquisite because of the One who’s writing it.

You don’t have to do enough, be enough, or strive until you have nothing left to give and are bone dry to the core of you.

Your Redeemer lives so that his Spirit can live through you, counsel you and help you be everything you were created to be. It is He who will complete the work and see it through till the end.

You are enough because Jesus is enough. Plain and simple.

Whether you’re evangelizing thousands, meeting fellow believers underground in a foreign land, or scrubbing dishes with a toddler tangled between your feet, your story matters.

It matters even when you receive that email from the editor who was on your side, but the numbers weren’t. It matters because God isn’t finished with it yet. If you grip it too tightly, it will never soar and take flight the way God intended.

So let it go. Watch it glide. And see God take it to places you never dreamed.

 

Linking up with these communities: #LiveFreeThursday

Advertisements

65 thoughts on “When You Want to Hide Your Story

  1. I was just having this moment, with myself and God, asking Him if I got it wrong, maybe I wasn’t meant to share mine, the going has been rough, results scattered…
    Then after prayer, and pledging to trust Him anew, your post is at the top of my screen in WP reader…
    Abby, your words echo exactly His… thank you, from the bottom of my trembling heart, thank you for heeding His call, and encouraging each of us to stay the course and watch Him complete the calling. And the timing, completely God. I thank Him the most, this morning.
    Much love, lady, much love 🙂

    Like

    • Stacy, thank you so much for sharing that with me. As I sat down to write this, I am simply prayed, “God, give the words. I can’t do this without you.” He is so faithful. Much love to you, friend.

      Like

  2. You have this way of capturing me with every post you write, Abby. I truly mean that. Such love and tenderness are expressed every single time. Thank you for that. He writes such beautiful stories, doesn’t He? Praying for us all to believe deep within us that our story matters because they point to Him. We are enough because of Him. Love you. xoxo

    Like

  3. God’s timing is always perfect. My thoughts these past few days, no one sees me, no one values what I do, everyone around me gets recognition, maybe God there is no plan, maybe this road I am on… well maybe it’s the wrong road… AND then I read your blog… It matters God what you think, and only You… you have a plan for my life and I am on a journey.. I will keep looking forward, believing you are with me every step, every hurdle, every word of discouragement that comes, you are bigger, more powerful in my life. I will cling to You my God! Thank you for this encouraging, uplifting and putting me back on solid ground to continue to do what God has asked of me no matter what I see or hear… from others.

    Like

    • Betty, thank you so much for sharing. I was just saying that as a wrote this, I simply prayed for God to give me the words. He is faithful and yes, cling to Him! He will give you the strength to press on. Praying his blessings over you.

      Like

  4. My.absolute.favorite. <– Thank you Abby, for sharing this. I love your words. I love that I sense God in them. I love that you are running after this call and that your story (which is His story written through you) is reaching others.

    Like

  5. Praise the LORD! I just love that Abby…my story is exquisite because of the One who’s writing it. Thank you. There are so many God winks in your writing today. Today I wrote My Story Is…Redeemed and you make mention of my Redeemer. This week I have felt more prompted to continue writing my “story” (book) after the “no” from publisher appointments at She Speaks last year.
    I have a story to write…
    #LiveFreeThursday

    Like

    • Thank you for making me smile today, Sarah. You are a blessing! And yes, keep pushing forward, friend. No matter how many “no’s” it takes, it will be worth it in the end. Yes, you have a story to write. Amen!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. “If you grip it too tightly, it will never soar and take flight the way God intended.” Yes! I sure do like to grip and control though. Thank the Lord He keeps shaking my story loose from my heart. Love this Abby. I am visiting today from #livefree Thursday but also just stopping by as a friend. xxxooo

    Like

  7. Abby, this is just so beautiful. I think we are sharing some of the same heart lessons. Our God is good… and so we can step forward in faith with our “little stories” knowing He is ultimately the author. I like the idea that if we don’t let loose our grip, we will never know how we can soar. 😉 Beautiful my friend.

    Like

    • Yes, I sense that he’s teaching some of the same heart lessons too. 🙂 He is so gracious and patient. Thank you for your sweet words today, both here and on your blog.

      Like

  8. Abby! You’ve done it again. I really love your posts. So many people need to hear this. I have been blessed, time and time again by the pieces of your story that you have shared. I’m interested to know, did this take place recently? What was the result? Are you writing or have you already written a book then? If so, sign me up for a copy. 🙂 The Author is doing wonderful works through you. God bless.

    Like

    • Kristi, you have blessed my heart today. My proposal needs a little tweaking and I’ve shelved it for now, but not permanently. This was an experience I had at the She Speaks conference last year and the editor liked my idea and the writing, but said I needed to work on my platform. (i.e., followers, etc.) God is truly growing me through this process and I know he’s not finished yet. Thank you for your encouragement, friend. I will certainly let you know when there is a book! 😉

      Like

  9. Great thoughts! We so often want our story to be important because of ‘us’ but it’s important because of HIM. Definite shift in thinking that lines up perfectly with Colossians 3:1-3.

    Like

  10. Girl, I’ve been in your shoes! Waiting for that appointment to go in and tell your story to see if it is worth anything to this editor. We do have stories to share, and thankfully, many platforms today to share them!

    Like

  11. Abby,
    This is absolutely beautiful and just the encouragement I needed to read. God is truly the One writing my story. He just asks me to pick up the pen and write. Even if the publisher was a “no” on the first go-round, I would love to read your story!! Your words speak life!
    Love and ((hugs)),
    Bev

    Like

    • I always hope to speak life, Bev. That is always my prayer. Thank you for your sweet encouragement and life giving words as well. I am blessed to know you, friend.

      Like

    • I think we all struggle with this in some way, Kim, and it’s once we grasp, even in part, that God is the author that we can begin to let go. Thanks so much for your encouragement. I’m so glad to see you writing and pushing forward, friend.

      Like

  12. You have a great way of expressing yourself and I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. Learning to live with courage instead of fear can only come from God because doubt closes the door to His designed plan for us. Letting go and letting Christ take control does take us places we never dreamed are possible, Thanks for a warm and comforting post Abby.

    Like

    • Christy, the resolution was in the line toward the end about the email from the editor, but I guess I should have elaborated a little more. I have a tendency to leave those details short.
      😉 The proposal is shelved…for now. But I know God’s not finished with it. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, dear friend!

      Like

      • Oh! OOps! I see why I missed it-you said “numbers” and I don’t “math.” lol God doesn’t need those numbers either. See how your story -little pieces of it are going out all the time, all for His glory! THAT (even though it isn’t a book deal)=WINNING!! 😀

        Like

  13. Abby, I always enjoy your posts, but this one made me cry. God and I just had a discussion about my story last night. He did a little heart surgery, as only the author and perfecter of my faith could do! Your writing is beautiful – I have no doubt, your book WILL be published in His timing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Michelle, thank you so much for your encouraging words. You truly made me smile. I believe that it will be published too and he continues to refine me in the wait. Much love to you.

      Like

  14. Hi Abby! I am your linky neighbor from Susan’s today! Thank you for this beautiful post – I needed this encouragement today…”Your story is exquisite because of the One who’s writing it.” Love and blessings to you! 🙂

    Like

  15. Abby, thank you for sharing these words, for telling your story. ‘Your story is exquisite because of the One who’s writing it.” Powerful. Compelling. Truth. Thanks doesn’t seem adequate, yet thank you.

    Like

  16. God has a plan for your story Abby! Sorry His timing wasn’t in line with this specific proposal, but don’t be discouraged. He is still “writing” and working in lives through you. Blessed by your words today. Thank you for sharing and the reminder that “it matters because God isn’t finished with it yet.” (so very true!)

    Like

  17. Abby, thank you for stopping by my blog so that I could come here and find yours. What beautiful words expressed here. I so often think my story has no meaning or value, that I have nothing of depth to say. Thank you for the reminder that because God writes my story, it has much value. Have a blessed weekend.

    Like

    • Barbie, I think we all go through those doubts and my prayer is always that whatever I have to say will be of encouragement to others. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. Have a great weekend!

      Like

  18. What an encouragement your words are to me today, Abby! Praying we can all embrace the truth that our story is worth hearing and wonderful because God is writing it. It’s all about Him, and when we get that…really get that…we can’t help but share it. So excited for your book. Praying God works out all the details and touches many lives through your words–beyond this wonderful blog.

    Like

  19. How I want to hear your story!

    Abby, I can’t tell you how many times Jesus has spoken to me through your words. He just did it again. Thank you for always coming back to the keyboard and pouring out your heart.

    Like

  20. Beautiful, Abby. Such truth. Love the freedom that’s found in realizing that it’s not about us, so we can just release it and let it be whatever it was meant to be. Thanks for sharing. ((sweet blessings))

    Like

  21. Oh Abby! This is perfect: “You are enough because Jesus is enough. Plain and simple.” I so wish your proposal presentation had turned out differently, but you do have a gift and I’m glad you are still using it (even if the numbers aren’t on your side right now).

    Like

  22. LOVE the graphic…and the thrust behind it. Abby, you’ve written encouragement all over this one. (And you took me back to my own tense, trembling moments with publishers at SheSpeaks. Good job! #livefreeThursday

    Like

  23. Oh Abby! I LOVED this! Truth, truth and more truth. We all have a story but the best part is your observation that He is the author. Keep on writing friend. Blessed by your words today!

    Like

  24. This is wonderful, Abby! No matter how big or small our stories seem, they are God’s stories and are worth sharing.

    Like

Share your thoughts...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s